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Now if you’ve paid attention to part one you learned a few things about my grandmother. Mostly you learned she didn’t care what she said. If she thought it she said it, plain and simple. Now that we’ve recapped on her big mouth let’s start on lesson two.

They say patience is a virtue and if this is true my grandmother was not a very virtuous person. Her lack of patience rivaled that of a toddler. When she wanted something she wanted it done then, not later, not next week, but right then.

This attitude toward getting things done probably came from her growing up when and where she did. She was raised in the county and the food they ate came from the family garden. They also raised chickens, cows, and pigs for meat. So, in her defense, there was never a time for things to wait. When the garden had to be hoed then it had to be hoed then before the weeds overtook the vegetables.

Although now it’s 1985 Granny still has a garden. I don’t mean a little patch where she has three or four plants; I mean a half acre lot. And at 73 years old she still got out and worked in the garden every day.  She loved her garden. She had a variety of plants and the ones she didn’t eat she canned them for the winter.

Granny lived on a long dirt road. There were only three houses on the road; hers, ours and my uncle’s. Across the road was a large pasture filled with cows. The owner of the land lived about ten minutes away from Granny’s house. He was a nice older gentleman in his 50’s. He kept one bull in his pasture for breeding purposes.

Well, if you have ever had cows you know that eventually one will find a way out. It’s just one of those things that happen and this time was no different. The man’s bull got out and went straight for the garden; lots of good things to eat in there for a bull. This, of course, set Granny out in a rage of fury. She cussed the bull, like it could understand what she was saying. She had a mouth on her like a sailor. When the bull refused to move she ran to the phone.

“Johnson, you’re god damn bull’s my garden. You better come get that sombitch before I shoot’em.”   (sombitch: southern pronunciation of “son of a bitch”)

“Yes, ma’am, I’ll rush right over and get him. Take me about ten minutes,” he told her.

“Well you better,” she yelled and hung up the phone.

As you can probably guess this is where the lack of patience comes in. Granny waited all of two minutes before taking action. She took her 20-gauge shotgun from behind and door and headed for the garden.

She pulled the shotgun into her shoulder and took aim. Then my 73 year old grandmother pulled the trigger. She didn’t even hesitate. The bull never flinched. A shotgun, meant for killing birds and squirrels, didn’t have the desired effect on the bull. However, because of the location of the wound the bull would no longer be able to do his duty, if you know what I mean.

Mr. Johnson was there a few minutes later and from what I heard he had to retire the bull. From that day forward he kept up his fence a little better.

The End
The word “grandmother, granny, grandma,” or other such names used to describe one’s parent’s parent, often provokes images of a sweet old lady, wearing an apron and making chocolate chip cookies from scratch. This, however, is not always the case, as such with my mother’s mother.

Granny, as we called her, was born in 1912. I always remembered the year she was born because it was the same year the Titanic sank. She was 18 when the Great Depression started but she never knew it. Being born and raised on farm money was always rare, so being broke was nothing new.

I tell you this because I feel it would better help you understand her behavior if you knew just a little about the hard life she led. Moreover, you should know, Granny was what one would consider a “wild child,” even by today’s standard. She had her first child out of wedlock, my aunt Janie, and never revealed who the father was, not even to Aunt Janie. This was a secret she took with her to the grave.

Now I want to set the stage for you. Picture a time, if you will, not unlike the present, but before cell phones and internet, where big hair and neon colors ran rampant. Yes, I am speaking of the 80’s.  This would put Granny in her early seventies. She was still full of life and driving at this time. However, because of convenience, my mother took her to the grocery store every week. This way they could get all their shopping done together.

The local Foodland served as the grocery store of choice for the two. I was in my early teens during this one event. I went with them on most trips to the store. I helped with the bags and whatnot. Most days I zoned out and didn’t listen to what they said but this particular day I heard every word. And I am both glad and ashamed I did.

As we reached the checkout line I began to unload the shopping chart, placing the many items on the conveyor belt. The lady behind the counter began ringing up the items and sliding them to the young boy to be bagged.

I remember looking at the boy who was probably only a year or two older than me. He was chubby, had long hair, and an earring in his left ear. Remember, this was the eighties. To me he didn’t seem out of place at all. In fact, if anyone else would have seen him they wouldn’t have given him another thought. However, my Granny wasn’t just anyone.

I guess her eyesight had started to go by this time; at least I like to think that was the reason. Also, you need to know my Granny had only one volume button on her speech: very loud. The woman didn’t know how to whisper, which only made this worse.

“I thought they only let boys bag groceries,” she said loud enough for everyone in the front of the store to hear.

Mom closed her eyes in frustration and lowered her head. Then she opened her eyes, leaned close to Granny and whispered, “Mama, that is a boy,” hoping that would end it. It didn’t.
“Well he’s got titties like a girl,” she said in her defense.

At this remark my body went stiff and everyone within a twenty foot radius stopped what they were doing and stared, including the young grocery bagger. My eyes went to my mother and she was covering her bright red face.

Then something weird happened. Everyone started moving again and pretended like it never happened. Mom paid the cashier and I started pushing the cart towards the door. Mom never said a word to Granny about what she had said, for two reasons. First, Granny didn’t think she said anything wrong, and second, she wouldn’t have cared if she had.

                                                      The End.
I have an older brother that, I believe, is going through the early stages of a form of mental illness. He is constantly lashing out at his family members, he confuses events from the past, and he thinks everyone is against him. I'm not sure what kind of illness, if any, this could be. I am also finding it hard to deal with. He's rude, mean, and he tells lies on people. That wouldn't be so bad but he does this over Facebook, letting all his friends see him as a victim. His friends know nothing about his slipping mind so they believe him. I just don't know what to do. He won't see anyone about this because he believes everything he says. Any advice?

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:iconcatthecapricorn:
CatTheCapricorn Featured By Owner May 31, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the watch bro! ;D
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:iconjaynesbrothersue:
jaynesbrothersue Featured By Owner May 31, 2014
I would have done it sooner but i didn't know you had a new account! :P
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:iconcatthecapricorn:
CatTheCapricorn Featured By Owner May 31, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
No worries~ :)
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:icontsuyosa-10:
Tsuyosa-10 Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2013  Student Writer
I'm back on Deviant yet again. I blame you for this! ;D
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:iconjaynesbrothersue:
jaynesbrothersue Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2013
I will gladly take the blame/credit for getting you back on here. ;)
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:iconarymay2013:
arymay2013 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
hello and welcome to #LOVE-Original-LIT c:
please make sure to read our homepage and if
you have any questions please don't hesitate to
ask -u- other then that, just have fun writing!
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:iconmelalina:
Melalina Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2012  Professional General Artist
Thanks for the llama.
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:iconjaynesbrothersue:
jaynesbrothersue Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2012
You're welcome!!
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:iconcherylrae:
CherylRae Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2012
JUST WANTED TO SAY HI!!
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:iconjaynesbrothersue:
jaynesbrothersue Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2012
Hey there!!
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